Dear Bobcat, 

My name is Anthony Anzora, and I am a first-generation alum of �ֲ���ý College, class of 2020. I am writing to you to share thoughts about my experience at �ֲ���ý and to offer some advice for you moving forward. 

First of all, congratulations for making it to �ֲ���ý. A lot of the time, we focus so much on the next thing, on how to progress, and on what we aspire to achieve. This way of thinking can impose a lot of pressure on yourself. In my case, a lot of pressure was imposed on me by my parents. I don’t blame them, they just wanted the best for me and wanted me to succeed. Pressure can be a double-edged sword – it can motivate you to put in the work, but it can be a weight on your mind that can take its toll. Every so often, I encourage you to pause the forward thinking mentality and to take the pressure off of you. Take a brief look back on your journey and be proud of your accomplishments to date. It is not easy to get into a school such as �ֲ���ý and to uproot yourself to move to the most northeastern state in the country. Because of your efforts and commitment to your education, you now have access to the tremendous resources �ֲ���ý has to offer. That is a feather in your cap, and that is something that you and your loved ones should recognize and be proud of. Offer yourself some grace. 

As the first son of immigrant parents, I didn’t really know how to navigate my experience leading up to and during college. I wasn’t aware of how to set myself up for a career out of college. As a first-year at �ֲ���ý, I wasn’t even sure what direction I wanted my career to take. To this I say, be curious. If you have an idea of what you want to do, speak to the Center of Purposeful Work. Get on LinkedIn and search for �ֲ���ý alums that are at companies you one day aspire to join. You are part of an incredible community that seeks to help uplift each other. By reaching out to �ֲ���ý alums, you can learn more about how they went from being in your position, a student at �ֲ���ý, to breaking into that company you dream of being a part of. Be curious about their journey, about the lessons they have learned along the way, and about what they have done to propel themselves forward. Additionally, when you connect with someone, be genuine and get to know the person you are speaking with. Networking is incredibly important in the professional world, and that is something I did not realize until the past 9 months as I have started my MBA program. Invest in the people around you, and invest in relationships with �ֲ���ý alumni. These are people that understand the journey you are on, and they will always be a Bobcat. 

Finally, have fun. We never know what life has in store for us. In the next three years, you will laugh, cry and create memories that will last you a lifetime. There is an incredible book that changed the way I think. It is called “The Obstacle Is The Way,” by Ryan Holiday. The title says it all. If you are confronted with adversity, don’t run away from it. Don’t avoid it. True growth comes from that adversity, from being uncomfortable. I am dealing with discomfort and challenges in my program right now, but if you choose to lean into it and embrace it, you will be able to conquer it and level up as a result. That is what I aspire to do, and that is what I put forward to you. I wish you nothing but the best, and I implore you to enjoy this experience, because it will go by in a flash. Go on trips with your friends, go to the school events, join a new club you’ve never considered being a part of. You never know who you’re going to meet or what you are going to discover about yourself. You have a certain level of freedom and opportunity at �ֲ���ý, so soak it up and be open to the changes this experience will spur within you. 

If you ever want to connect for career advice or guidance, I am happy to connect. My email is adanzora@gmail.com and you can find me on LinkedIn. Trust the journey, and trust yourself. 

Take care, 

Anthony Anzora

Dear First Gen Bobcat,

I am so proud of you for accomplishing your first year of college! Your hard work, dedication, and learning and navigating a space such as �ֲ���ý, higher education, a new population group, and Maine is no easy feat. Although learning these spaces is never-ending, you did the most challenging part: starting. I want to commend you for doing so. Going to college is a critical step in life in how you want to be. 

Please reflect on the time you were considering college and how daunting that was. The closest people to us did not take on this journey, and relying on others made the process even more hazy. Despite this, our loved ones’ sacrifices and support got us through to getting our acceptance and entryway to do so. The depth of their knowledge, wisdom, and life experiences has enriched our lives in ways rivaling the benefits of higher education. Please do not lose sight of that.

Take time to reflect on your first year at �ֲ���ý College, the person you were, and the person you’ve become through this experience. Use your newfound privilege of attending higher education to uplift, inspire, and extend grace to others. Let this guide your perspective as you move through different life spaces, helping yourself and others while honoring the challenges and origins that shaped you.

Understand that you are ever-changing and have this summer opportunity to recharge, take it easy, and do something fun! Learn that only so much is within your control, and let things go. If a situation cannot be changed, adapt in ways that make things easier. Most importantly, know your limits. It’s okay to say you don’t know, ask questions, and seek help when needed.

I am currently a graduate student at Columbia University, and to be honest, �ֲ���ý prepared me for it. I am forever grateful for my time at �ֲ���ý, not only for academic reasons, but I miss the intimacy of �ֲ���ý, the beauty and pace of Maine, and the vibrant community that �ֲ���ý has established for its students. I love to say that I am a �ֲ���ý graduate!

Please have a wonderful and well-deserved summer back home!

Kindly,

Nina Flores ’20 
San Antonio/NYC

Dear Bobcat, 

First, I want to say congratulations on one year at �ֲ���ý; it truly is a magical place that you’ll remember forever. 

So as I am writing this, I’m on a company bus from New Jersey to Manhattan. I work at Verizon’s corporate headquarters in Basking Ridge. It’s a cloudy evening, and I can’t wait to get home. 

In 3 years, you’ll be coming from your own job, or graduate classes or just existing at home who knows; there are multiple paths ahead of you. 

And that range of options is probably what you’re feeling right now, from which major to choose and which late night party to go to. Cherish the choices while you have them in abundance. 

Quick bio. I’m Michael, 25, live in NYC, born in Jamaica. I’m a marketing strategist. Digital, social, billboards, design, and recently everything AI and career development. I’ve worked in tech, higher education, non profits and retail. The United Nations, Verizon, and Columbia University are some career highlights. I am the first in my immediate family to complete a 4 year degree. 

I’m going to talk about three things: what you’ve accomplished so far, how that accomplishment changes how you show up in your home and community, as well as what the future can have in store for you. 

What you’ve accomplished 

You’re first gen which means this must be a lot. For me, when I stepped into �ֲ���ý’ campus I was overwhelmed and I remember being in Roger Williams and just realizing I actually made it to a great school. In many ways it is both normal and extraordinary. It’s normal because millions of students have walked the halls of schools just like �ֲ���ý, across the world. But, it is extraordinary as an experience due to being first gen and also realizing even without that category of ‘college’, �ֲ���ý stands out. It’s because of the 80k tuition, the connections, the resources, the status all rolled into one. So getting here, thriving, and being the first in your family to do it is a very important thing to internalize. Congratulate yourself. 

How that accomplishment changes how you show up in your home and community My first summer back home (Jamaica) was a weird mix of feelings. People said I spoke like an American, I went to different hangout spots, and I stopped taking public transport for the most part. I felt awkward and excited at the same time. For you, whether you’re international or not, you’ll begin to see your community differently. You’ve just gotten a peak into academia, and a structure that ‘runs’ society. You’ll start noticing the types of jobs people do, how many people you know have degrees, how many people value things you no longer value.

Take it all in, and I recommend writing your feelings down for processing and reference. They will change, and you will continue to morph as you go to second , third and final year. That’s normal, and everything you feel now is normal. 

I will also say the perspective shift was nice. I felt like someone on the outside appreciating my home for the first time. Also as I write this section, it’s 1:04 AM about 2 weeks after I started on the bus. As you take on more work, you’ll realize into a few priority items slip through, and you 

you make your schedule work for you. But let’s continue. A perspective shift is important. It helps you to value home, it helps you to value yourself – the version that existed there for years. 

And now the future ahead 

Don’t worry about a major yet. After a year, you realize what you might have somewhat of an interest in, but that will also change. Quick crash course. If you’re international and on an F-1, STEM designated subjects allow you 3 years post �ֲ���ý in a job, otherwise you have 1 year. 

Law is baked in, pre med people also baked in, that’s more cookie cutter. If you’re interested in consulting for a huge firm, you need some math/quantitative experience through a minor, major or class projects. If you are interested in finance, that is also somewhat baked in. If you’re interested in international affairs, politics, sociology, psychology and some technical subject is a good balance. As you can see there are many paths, you will find one soon enough. And that path can also be nothing for a bit, but I know that’s a luxury for many you see around you. My only requirement is that you must take a Theatre class called Voice & Speech. No matter what, you must take it within the 4 years. You’ll discover yourself through that class, and find even a sliver of your voice. Trust me. 

So now I’m wrapping this up, you have a summer to enjoy. Final words. You are brilliant for getting to �ֲ���ý, you will learn how to think and communicate your ideas at �ֲ���ý. You will meet great friends at �ֲ���ý, and because of a rich history, you will become part of a thriving alumni cohort. Take an extra cookie at commons, refill the orange juice, go to the gym, speak up in clubs, enjoy the weekends inside or outside. 

And most importantly remember. You’ve accomplished so much already, and the future can be even sweeter. 

Best, 

Michael Morgan (michaelmorgan6015@gmail.com) 
Class of 2022

Dear Bobcat,

Congratulations on completing your first year at �ֲ���ý. At times, we underestimate how difficult it can be to navigate major life transitions, but you did it. The first year can be one of the most difficult, because you are adapting academically, socially in a new environment. You are setting boundaries with roommates, advocating for yourself, maintaining and/or establishing healthy regimes, managing your own finances and settling into clubs or sports on campus. After my first year at �ֲ���ý, one of the biggest challenges I faced was giving up what I had in mind. I entered college, top of my high school class with hopes of being a neuroscience major. After a gruesome year of chemistry, biology, physics, intro to neuroscience, and those courses I dropped, I learned it was OK to shift gears. I completed my first year, though I was discouraged the path I so intricately designed at 14 years old, was no longer sustainable at 18. I wish I would have known that changes in course of study, goals, and preferences are not failures. The ability to adapt is and will continue to be a part of life. If this first year was not the quintessential version of what you had in mind, just know it gets better. You are no longer starting from scratch. Take your successes (as I am sure there are many) from this year and build upon them. Use the bumps in the road as building blocks. You will make it!

Returning home after your first year of college can be different than how it was before you left. You are different. You have gained a great deal of independence. You will have to learn how to communicate your needs and boundaries while being respectful of the rules in the home you will spend your summer. While you may fall back into some routines, others have changed, be patient as your loved ones learn to relate to you as a young adult. You may also notice changes in the dynamics with your friends and peers (for better or worse) from back home. This is normal, yet another change you will have to adapt to. I am sure you have so many great things to share about the classes you’ve taken, the relationships you’ve built, and the activities you have participated in while at �ֲ���ý. You may have been introduced to new snacks (I discovered Humpty Dumpty all dressed chips), expressions or even made stylistic changes, embrace it. Share your experiences. When I was younger, I enjoyed listening to students returning from college. It gave insight to a space I hoped to be in one day. Don’t downplay your experiences. If it is important to you, it is a big deal. 

I hope you have a great summer! As you continue to adapt, learn and grow, I hope you take the resilience, and joy you acquired in your first year and share it with those around you. I hope you do something fun. For some, these summers during college can be one of the last periods you have consecutive months off at a time. Take advantage of it. Also know, being off campus does not mean you no longer have access to the plethora of �ֲ���ý resources available to you. Whether it is career development or mental health use them as needed. And don’t forget to keep in contact with your fellow Bobcats. Enjoy, and be safe.

All the best,

Marissa J. Phoenix, ‘15

Dear Fellow �ֲ���ýie, 

First of all, let me extend my congratulations! You made it here and are following your dreams of getting a college education. I am so very proud of you! As a first-generation college graduate, I know that this road less traveled is at times a very difficult one. However, I promise that it is incredibly rewarding. 

After completing my first year of college in 2017, I felt both a sense of accomplishment and anxiety. I had no idea this was normal. I felt accomplished for doing something no one in my family had ever done. But I was worried about what was to come: going back home, getting a summer job, starting a new semester. So much of the new world I had entered seemed uncertain, and I felt unprepared to handle those changes. I wish I had known that it was okay to ask for help. So, I am writing to tell you that. �ֲ���ý is an incredible place with such warm faculty and staff who are willing to help you every step of the way. Take full advantage of your �ֲ���ý community. They are there to help you chase and achieve your goals way beyond your wildest imagination. 

While at �ֲ���ý, I found my community through the Office of Intercultural Education (or as we called it at the time, the ooh-wee, or as you call it now, the Student Center for Belonging and Community). The OIE was central to easing my transition to and from �ֲ���ý each year. It was, and I hope still is, a place for gathering, sharing food and stories, and connecting with others like you and not like you. One of the most impactful moments from my time in the OIE was a movie night when we watched Coco. So many people gathered to commune and tell stories of their loved ones who had passed. A table was set up so people could bring photos of their loved ones to commemorate them. It was an emotional night, but a beautiful one. It was a true testament to the safety and trust created there that so many of us felt comfortable sharing and experiencing this vulnerability together. The OIE and the people who frequented it always made me feel at home at �ֲ���ý. I urge you to find out where your community on campus is. Don’t be afraid to lean into the vulnerability of new experiences because it is this that will allow you to forge deep bonds with those around you. I met many of my close friends today at the OIE. These are the people who helped me navigate �ֲ���ý and continue to help me navigate life. 

Lastly, I want you to know that your �ֲ���ý community extends far beyond the students you will meet during your time there. It includes a vast group of alumni who walked the same campus as you. In my experience, alumni have always been willing and enthusiastic to help the next generation of Bobcats. In fact, I landed my first job out of college due to the help of a �ֲ���ý alum who graduated in 1990, 30 years before I did. This wonderful �ֲ���ý community has helped me continue to traverse this path less paved, and I know the same will be true for you. 

Please remember that no matter the challenges, you are more than capable of achieving your goals. And in the moments when you may feel uncertain, call on your �ֲ���ý community. They will respond lovingly. 

The world awaits you! 

Best Regards, 
Tabatha Roman ’20

What’s up, my fellow Bobcat!

As I am approaching my 10-year reunion, I have been in my feelings a bit as I’ve been reflecting on my time at �ֲ���ý; and, when I received an email about the opportunity to write a letter to a fellow first-gen student, I thought about what I would write about.

First, let me tell you a bit more about myself. My name is Kira Shaikh, and I grew up just outside of Hartford, CT. My father is a Pakistani immigrant who drove a yellow taxi for most of my childhood, and eventually earned his GED the same year my younger brother graduated from high school (2013). My mom grew up east of Hartford, earned a high school diploma, and struggles with addiction. I am one of four with an older sister, an older brother, me, and a younger brother. We (6 of us, sometimes 7 including my uncle) lived in a 3-4 bedroom house with one bathroom. You can imagine the lack of personal space and boundaries! 

Though I could expand on more, I want to share a significant moment that I think challenged my college experience unlike many of my peers. When I was in high school, my mom left. My older sister and brother had already left the house as well, so it was just my dad (who worked about 18 hours of the day and just came home to sleep), my younger brother, and I. I quickly turned into the caregiver of the home. As I was trying to finish up high school, my responsibilities seriously changed.

After caring for my brother and the house during my senior year and that summer, I had mixed emotions going all the way to Maine. I wrestled with leaving my brother and thought about how he would do this all without me there, while also looking forward to finally being “free” and starting a new life for me, and just me.

When I got to �ֲ���ý, my plan was to play softball. During my first year, I went to all the captain’s practices and workouts with the full expectation to play softball while still driving the four hours back and forth on the weekends to check in on things back at home. That all changed after Winter Break when I looked at the softball in-season schedule and expectations. First, I realized that I could not afford the gear that was required or the spring training Florida trip, and Second, I realized that I would not be able to go home for about four months. I could not not go back to my brother for four months. Early February, just a week or two before the season officially started, I went into the coach’s office, made some excuse, and shared that I did not want to be a part of the team. For my first two years at �ֲ���ý, I did not play softball because I wanted to make sure my younger brother graduated from high school and got to college.

I share this experience because I battled with myself for a long time. I sacrificed my own growth for my family, and what I believed was for the betterment of my family. Over time, I have learned (and am still reminding myself) that the best way to support my family is to support myself first. The best version of me that I give myself will translate to giving the best version to my family.  When putting myself first, of course, I got reminded by my family of things like: “you left your family,” “you don’t care about your family,” “you are selfish,” “you’ve changed,” and everything else you can think of. It is hard to ignore those emotional reactions from your loved ones, but I know today that focusing on my personal growth allowed me to to provide for them in better ways, and in more sustainable ways, than I would have if I stuck around. I broke out of that cycle to help adjust their cycle, and maybe eventually, my family’s future cycle.

In the moment, going away to college was hard on me and my family, however, it paid off. I did decide to play softball my last two years at �ֲ���ý, and made amazing relationships with my teammates, and demonstrated mental, emotional, and literally, physical strength to my family. When I played softball, I did much better in my classes and earned higher grades. I become the first person in my family to graduate from college, and eventually obtained my Master’s. With everything I proved to my family, I inspired my younger brother to go to college, post-grad, and earn his Juris Doctor Degree, in which, he is doing really well for himself and family. My brother and I as able to take care of my dad in the ways in which he supported us for so many years. I’ll call this a win.

This letter was a handful of a story, but if you get one thing out of this ramble, I hope you know that you can do this. Jump into everything that �ֲ���ý has to offer. Allow �ֲ���ý to challenge you. Allow �ֲ���ý to make you question, and then to discover yourself. Allow �ֲ���ý to help you. Once you are helped, you can then help others.

I hope you have a good summer as I hope that you can recharge. Please reach out (KiraShaikh15@gmail.com) if you would like to chat further!

Go Cats!
Kira Shaikh ‘15